'My Ex Has Nowhere To Go Now We've Broken Up. Do I Owe Her A Place To Stay?'

Person moving outSpeaking to HuffPost UK previously, clinical social worker, licensed couples and sex therapist, and founder of Emily Lambert Robins, Emily Lambert Robins, said that the high cost of rent could be leaving you stuck in situationships. “The ambiguity [of situationships] may function as a defence mechanism. If housing, income, and long-term stability feel out of reach, it may feel safer not to get emotionally attached,” she said at the time. But how does the harsh housing market affect couples who’ve broken up? That’s a question u/SnapNo51 was left to ask members of Reddit’s r/AITAH (Am I The Asshole Here) following a complicated split. “AITA for expecting my ex-girlfriend to move out after she broke up with me, even though she has nowhere else to go?” they asked. We asked relationship therapist and author at Passionerad, Sofie Roos, about the tricky situation. The pair had lived together for two years They’d cohabited for two of the four years the couple had been together, the original poster (OP) said.They lived in a home the 27-year-old had inherited from his grandmother. His then-girlfriend “Megan” had been unemployed for a while, because she was pursuing a master’s degree. “I’ve been supporting her financially and emotionally while she’s been in school,” OP, who stressed he didn’t “resent” her for that, said. But Megan recently broke up with the poster. “I think it’s fair for her to move out. She doesn’t agree. She says she has nowhere else to go,” OP explained. Her parents live in an RV and none of her friends have capacity to take her in. She’s been given 45 days to find arrangements, the poster wrote, and has since tried to get back together in a move he sees as accommodation-focused. “I don’t hate her, but I don’t think it’s healthy for either of us to keep living together in this limbo,” he continued.It’s fair to set limits, Roos says Roos told us that the limit makes sense – she considers 45 days pretty generous. But the therapist admits that the situation is “one of the most tricky” you can get into following a breakup, and added that kindness is key as you navigate your boundaries. Set a deadline and stick to it, she advised, but “have rules for how you’re gonna live together during this middle time” to make the interim more bearable. You might also want to help her find a place to stay if you feel comfortable, she added. “It’s about being kind and showing mercy to your ex, but... balance that with what you need and how you feel,” she shared.“The clearer you are in your communication around that, and the more you can make your ex understand that this is the deadline we will be following, the higher chances that they come up with somewhere own to stay.”Whatever you do, she ends, “avoid getting into your old patterns by becoming some sort of roommates with benefits.” This could draw the already-difficult process out for both of you. Related...'My Mother-In-Law Insulted My WFH Job. Was My Response Unfair?''I Ghosted My Friend After She Asked To Split Her Birthday Bill. Was I Unfair?''My Partner Vaped Suring Sex. Was My Reaction Unfair?'

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