Porn-Addicted Children Are A 'Regrettable' Reality, Therapist Says

Former Strictly Come Dancing winner Ore Oduba has opened up about his decades-long addiction to pornography. On the We Need To Talk podcast, he said: “Nine, that is when my addiction started, when I was introduced to pornography.”Describing the experience as “isolating”, he added: “This is, I believe, one of the biggest problems we have societally. There is such a prevalence.”Speaking to HuffPost UK, psychotherapist Dr Paula Hall, who founded sex and porn addiction provider The Laurel Centre and sex and porn addiction support hub Pivotal Recovery, said this reflects what she sees in her practice. “Regrettably, we see this a lot,” she said. “According to our stats at Pivotal Recovery, [among those] who are seeking help for problematic porn use, 51% say their problem started under the age of 15, 15% said under the age of 12. “And recent research from LADbible with over 5,000 Gen Zs showed that one in 20 accessed porn under the age of 10 and 49% accessed porn for sex education.” Here, we asked Dr Hall how to approach the topic with children. How (and when) should I talk to my child about porn? Oduba said he thought the “traditional idea of sex education, that right now kids are being educated at 14 at school” was outdated – by that age, he pointed out, he’d “had five years of exposure to a world that nobody is discussing”.Dr Hall agreed: “Regrettably, even with the recent Ofcom age-gating restrictions, many young people will still find ways to access porn, and for many, it may be too late. Therefore, it’s essential that parents talk about pornography and have open, honest conversations about the potential risks that accompany it.” For the therapist, it is never too soon to start conversations about our bodies.“Even with a toddler, we can start talking about why we keep our genitals private and why it’s not OK for adults to show us their genitals,” she said.“We can also be real about the fact that our genitals provide nice and interesting sensations, and enjoying that is OK. It’s essential not to shame children, but to talk to them in language that is appropriate for their age.” This, of course, evolves as children age.By the time they’re approaching adolescence and “have increasing access to online material, either at home or with peers,” the therapist said, “we need to talk about the kind of material they may find that might leave them feeling confused or uncomfortable.”Shaming children and teens for sexual curiosity will not helpOduba explained that fear of punishment led him to keep his porn addiction to himself as a child.He warned that children in homes where sex is never discussed may “start self-educating, because it’s too sensitive to touch. They will start sharing it between themselves.”Dr Hall is on his side. “Sexual curiosity is a very normal and healthy response as we begin to go through puberty, so [the lead-up to adolescence] is a particularly important time to have conversations to help young people navigate the online world, including social media and image sharing with peers,” she told us.Keeping the lines of communication open, without judgment or shame, can make your child feel comfortable opening up to you about any concerns they might have, she ended.“By all means, talk about the potential risks, but be sure to do so in a non-shaming way that encourages children and young people to feel confident and comfortable continuing to talk to you whenever they need to.” Related...Porn Is Educating Our Kids About Sex – Are We OK With That?I Teach A College Course On Porn. Here's What I Learned From My Students.Kids As Young As 6 Have Been Accidentally Coming Across Porn Online

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