I thought I'd save money living as a digital nomad, but managing finances on the move was unexpectedly stressful — and I was lonely.

Lillywhite now lives with his family in Dorset, England.Courtesy of Matthew LillywhiteIn January 2019, Matt Lillywhite landed in Malaysia, hoping to become a full-time digital nomad.Living abroad was lonelier than he expected, and he struggled to manage his finances.Lillywhite now lives with his family in the UK, traveling less frequently and more intentionally.On my first day in Kuala Lumpur, I posted the view from my apartment on my Instagram story and replied to messages from "jealous" friends.Then, I put my phone down and realized I didn't know a single person in the city.I got bit by the travel bug during a working holiday in Australia in 2017, where I started dabbling in online writing. When I got back to my home in the UK, I kept freelancing. With no office or set hours, I started to consider working abroad.I thought being a digital nomad would offer unlimited freedom and the ability to make friends in other countries. But my expectations turned out to be very different from reality. Writing from a café all day without speaking to anyone was incredibly lonely, and keeping track of my expenses on the move was mentally taxing.After spending nine months across 10 countries, I flew back to the UK in June 2019. I no longer travel as frequently, preferring to go on holidays where someone I know is either traveling with me or waiting on the other side. I find it much more fulfilling.I thought becoming a digital nomad would help me save moneyIt can be hard to sustain a steady income as a freelancer, so I figured spending time in countries with a lower cost of living during the early stages of my writing career could be financially helpful.Most digital nomads I followed online recommended saving three to six months' worth of expenses prior to the trip for emergencies. However, in my excitement to see the world, I waited until I could cover my flight and the first few weeks' accommodation, assuming I'd figure out the rest later.Lillywhite visited 10 countries, including Malaysia, Thailand, and Canada.Courtesy of Matthew LillywhiteI made a few embassy appointments and got my documentation in order for the countries I wanted to visit. I spent time in Australia to catch up with old friends before booking a ticket to Malaysia in January 2019.Managing finances while travelling was stressfulA few days after landing in Malaysia, I was already counting pennies. I wanted to enjoy being in a new country, but didn't want to empty my bank account within the first few weeks.Growing up, my mum and I didn't talk much about finances. When I started earning, I wasn't well-versed in financial management.Lillywhite struggled with unexpected expenses while traveling.Courtesy of Mathew LillywhiteBy the time I reached Thailand, roughly three weeks later, I was telling myself I just needed one good month to get back on track financially. But an unexpected expense, like a doctor's appointment or an overweight baggage fee, always chipped away at my current account.Some nights, I struggled to sleep, constantly wondering how I could feel so stressed with a lifestyle that enabled me to travel the world.Living abroad was isolatingI tried to meet people at language learning events or at hostels, but as an introvert, it was difficult to talk to strangers. After a few weeks, I decided to keep to myself.Meanwhile, I'd scroll through photos that friends back home were posting online: birthdays, nights out, people sitting around a barbecue. Their lives looked stable, whereas mine looked like guesswork.I chose the transience of the digital nomad lifestyle, so I didn't think I could complain. But every time I moved, I had to start all over. New bus routes, new plug sockets, and, always, the loneliness crept in. I lost motivation, struggled to focus, and stopped feeling like myself.I now travel less frequently, but more intentionallyI was in Istanbul when I realized I hadn't seen my mum in over six months.I sent her a message asking if we could meet somewhere in Europe. A few days later, she booked a flight to Budapest, and we stayed together in a small Airbnb. We cooked dinner and watched a movie like we used to back home. Even though we only spent a few days together, it helped me realize I didn't need to travel to feel fulfilled. Connection was more important.I stayed on the move for a bit longer, but since the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020, I haven't gone back to long-term travel. I now live with family in Dorset.Lillywhite flew home to the UK in June 2019.Courtesy of Matthew LillywhiteI still travel occasionally and see it as a way to spend time with loved ones. A few months ago, I went to Berlin with my dad. More recently, I visited my girlfriend in Boston, spending a week exploring bookstores and counting squirrels in the park.Traveling is now less about a solo escape and more about being around people who make life worth living.I still freelance in the UK, and I've had to learn from the financial mistakes I made abroad. I try to plan, track what I spend, and check if I can actually afford something before saying yes. It sounds simple, but I've learned that simple money habits are often the most effective.When people ask me what I do, I tell them I write, and I used to be a digital nomad."It sounds like a dream!" they often reply.Parts of the digital nomad lifestyle were. I could technically work from anywhere, and I visited more countries in a few months than I ever thought I would in a lifetime. But I also went months without hearing my name or spending time with people who really knew me.I wish someone had told me that before I left. Not just that travel can get lonely, but that one day I'd wake up, realize I hadn't had a real conversation in weeks, and think that was normal.Do you have a story to share about being a digital nomad? Contact the editor, Charissa Cheong, at [email protected] the original article on Business Insider

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