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QUENTIN LETTS: Sir Keir adopted the jaw-taut expression of a man with electrodes attached to his sweetbreads

Oh cruellest of cuts! Towards the end of the Trump-Starmer press conference, Sky News's Beth Rigby mentioned Peter Mandelson. Called him 'the elephant in the room'.

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QUENTIN LETTS: She needed to give a belter of a speech - and she did. When she made her final announcement everyone went nuts!

QUENTIN LETTS: Sir Mel, fresh as a porpoise, gave a splendid speech. Alas, few were there to hear it

QUENTIN LETTS: The sight of Maggie's old outfits at Tory conference is creepy. It's time for the party to end its obsession with her if it is to have any chance of a revival

QUENTIN LETTS: Kemi Badenoch stood there, small, still, musing in that smoky voice... not shouting like a larky fake

QUENTIN LETTS: Ambitious Ed took ownership of the PM. Maybe, just maybe, he could seize the helm again...

QUENTIN LETTS: For a grinding hour, Sir Keir pulverised the nation into a powder of boredom

QUENTIN LETTS: She droned on and on like a robot with a bunged-up nose... while our oblong potato of a PM applauded

QUENTIN LETTS: His eyeballs thrashed in their sockets during his BBC party conference interview... the Prime Minister was jolly cross

QUENTIN LETTS: Bereft of ideas, plunging in the polls, Labour's come up with a patronising new buzzphrase. Give me strength

QUENTIN LETTS: Jutting his jaw and stiffening his neck, Ed Davey's Lib Dems speech was a performance rehearsed in front of a full-length mirror

QUENTIN LETTS: Ed Davey's seesawing Dems don't know if they're Liberal or not - make your mind up, people!

QUENTIN LETTS: Is it time to retire the stunts? 'Nooo' the activists shouted, and Sir Big Ed beamed

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For the first time in a year the Tories felt like a serious force in parliament: QUENTIN LETTS

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His fatal flaw wasn't sex or even money, for all his love of whiffy billionaires. No what captivated Mandelson above all else was power: QUENTIN LETTS

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QUENTIN LETTS: Ex-ministers watched the PM squirm like a fresh-caught eel on the riverbank

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Opinions

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