Lorde Opens Up About How Debilitating Eating Disorder Affected Her

Lorde performing a surprise set at Glastonbury last monthLorde has opened up about a debilitating eating disorder that she says prevented her from making music.The New Zealand-born performer recently unveiled her fourth album Virgin, which became the first of her career to top the UK charts.However, during a new interview with BBC Radio 1, the Green Light singer admitted that making the album initially proved difficult while she was still dealing with her eating disorder.“All I was thinking about was trying to weigh as little as possible,” she explained. “Going to sleep thinking about food, waking up thinking about food and exercise – that was my creative pursuit.”Lorde added that when she entered recovery, she began to feel creative again.The Grammy winner first publicly alluded to her eating disorder when she contributed her verse to a new version of Charli XCX’s Brat cut Girl, So Confusing last year, on which the two stars sang about their past differences and “worked it out on the remix”.Lorde was heard singing: “You’d always say, ‘let’s go out’, but then I’d cancel last minute, I was so lost in my head and scared to be in your pictures, ’cause for the last couple years I’ve been at war with my body, I tried to starve myself thinner, and then I gained all the weight back.“I was trapped in the hatred, and your life seemed so awesome, I never thought for a second, my voice was in your head.”Lorde went on to reference her eating disorder struggle on a number of Virgin cuts, including lead single What Was That?.She told Radio 1: “It was hard [writing the album], it was scary. Some songs aren’t easy. I made a lot of changes and really put my artistry front and centre and made that my full-time job and I got a lot of stuff out of the way.”During an interview with Rolling Stone published in May, Lorde disclosed that her eating disorder began to present issues when she was still promoting her third album Solar Power.“I felt so hungry and so weak,” she recalled of that time, comparing her condition to “this sucking of a life force or something”.She went on to share: “I don’t know how those two things can be true, that I’m having this really amazing, rich experience of playing the shows and meeting these kids, and [yet] I’m also looking at the pictures afterward and feeling deep loathing at the sight of my beautiful, tiny tummy, thinking it was so unforgivable what I had allowed it to become.”Help and support:Beat: Adult Helpline: 0808 801 0677 and Youthline: 0808 801 0711, or email [email protected] (adults) [email protected] (youth support) Samaritans: Open 24 hours a day, on 116 123Mind: Open Monday to Friday, 9am-6pm on 0300 123 3393 READ MORE:Lorde Makes Candid Comments About Her Gender Identity And Feeling Somewhere 'In The Middle'3 Key Signs Of Eating Disorders To Keep An Eye Out For In Children And TeensWe Can't Ignore The Spike In Eating Disorder Emergencies Any Longer

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