I'm A Parenting Coach – If You Have A 'Hard' Kid, I Want You To Know 3 Things

While every kid inevitably has their moments where they’ll stomp, shout and throw something in frustration, some kids simply seem “harder” to parent than others. Dubbed “hard kids”, parenting educator Genevieve Muir describes them as “the kid that you have to call the name of so many more times than other kids in the playground, the kid that you dragged out kicking and screaming yesterday, the kid that is biting or hitting or pushing”.Muir, who has four sons and is the founder of Connected Parenting, shared a TikTok video where she promised parents of “hard kids” that “it is going to be OK”.“Your kid is not broken, your kid is not destined for prison, your kid is a deep-feeling, highly sensitive kid – and they are struggling with regulating their sensory system and their emotions, and making sense of where they fit in the world,” she explained. Advice for parents of ‘hard kids’The parenting coach and obstetric social worker highlighted the first five to eight years of a child’s life as being particularly tricky for parents of “hard” kids. She urged these parents to be kind to themselves, and prioritise self-care by taking breaks.“It’s not that you’re mucking it up, it’s not that you’re not nailing the parenting scripts, it’s not you. You just got a harder kid,” she said. Her second tip for parents in this position is to be willing to ask for help – this could be among friends and family members, so you can enjoy those aforementioned breaks, but mainly it means professional help. If something doesn’t feel right – and it might look like a child’s struggles increasing, or they don’t enjoy things they used to, or things are getting worse, said the expert, and your gut is simply saying something isn’t right, don’t be afraid to get it checked out.Speak to your GP, speak to a therapist. Your child might just need more help and support with regulating their emotions, they might need adjustments you hadn’t thought of, or they might need further help which could include a diagnosis. Her last point is that “hard kids” do not want to give their parents a hard time. “Your kid desperately wants to please you and they desperately want to be a good kid,” she added.The caption for the video, which has been viewed 25,000 times, reads: “Some kids struggle so much more and this is your sign to believe things will get easier. That your efforts are not wasted. And that your kid desperately doesn’t want to be the Hard kid.”The clip resonated with a lot of parents. “Crying watching this as I constantly feel like I’m not doing enough or teaching the right things,” said one commenter. “The parents that have an ‘easy’ kid don’t understand and that’s what makes it difficult because all eyes are on you as the parent.”“I have 2 neurodivergent kids and am about to curl up in a little ball and have a breakdown but know that I can’t,” added another parent. “As a mum of 3 boys, with my eldest definitely being a hard kid, thank you so so much. I NEEDED this,” said a grateful mum. There were also plenty of comments from parents of “hard” kids who have come out the other side, too.“My hard kid just turned 10 and is like a different person now. There were so many days I would think I love you but I don’t like you. I still carry guilt for that. He is a beautiful kind soul. Just took longer to show up,” said one mum. Another said: “Very good advice. I had the hard kid and as a now 20 year old, he is the nicest, kindest, gentlest boy.”Hang on in there. Related...10 Early Signs Of ADHD In Toddlers Experts Want Parents To KnowA Parent Told Me 'Everyone Seems To Have Autism These Days' – Here's What I Want Them To KnowThere's A Reason Your Child's After-School Meltdowns Are So Explosive

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